A Few Quick Hits

(1) Craig "Junior" Miller was on fire this morning.  He played the race card explicitly (even used the phrase "I'm going to play the race card") in arguing that the Rangers wouldn't give a black player the same chance after chance that they are giving Josh Hamilton.   Then he called Sooner quarterback Baker Mayfield a "spazz" and "spastic," not just once, but several times.  Not disputing the point -- just a little startling to hear while I'm shaving.

(2) I haven't heard much of Monty + The Machine (i.e., "Not a Podcast") lately.  I did hear some of Mike "The Machine" Marshall's post-game Mavericks work and thought it was pretty good.

(3) We now have some theories on the ubiquity of those unlistenable Meador ads.  (i) A couple of posts ago a Confessor advised that Meador had fallen off a list of -- I forget exactly, maybe the Confessor can re-post, but the thought was that it had lost a spot on a list of quality or trustworthy dealers, or something like that.  Accounts for a million ads that say nothing about the products or the price, but are all about honesty, transparency, and the like.   (ii) General Sales Manager Charlie Gray, I'm guessing, is doing all those voices and, I'm also guessing, writes the copy.  Remember the one where Charlie is talking and all of a sudden, without an obvious edit, "Bob" begins to talk?

(4)  I owe Emmitt Smith an apology.  For weeks I drove by the digital billboard going north on the Tollway not far from downtown, and I would see this ad for PlainsCapital bank.  It showed a photograph of Emmitt and what I took to be a computer-generated image of a very beautiful young woman.  I mean, I thought she was a product of the animator's art, I really did.  The legend was "Our Bank Has Swagger."  Why, I thought, would they generate some fake image to show with Emmitt?  I thought maybe she was supposed to be his banker.   Here is the photo, without the PlainsCapital logo.

I suppose a true fan would know that that is his wife, Pat.  But I didn't.  Driving by at 65 mph, with billboard-quality resolution, I thought she was CGI all the way.  Turns out no, she's just perfect.  So I apologize to both Mr. and Mrs. Smith for my crass error.  Been making a lot of those lately.

Go forth, Confessors.

Ticketshock [+ CORRECTION]

All right, Confessors, let's get some reports from Ticketstock, and photos if you have them.  (Send to ThePlainsman1310@gmail.com)

To my surprise, The Girl said she was game for some Ticketstock.

In the past, I have usually departed work early on Friday to attend.   I would arrive at the Irving Convention Center maybe four-ish, and the crowds would already be good and the booths lined up in several rows and along the walls.

This time  .  .  .

We arrived around 6:30.  Paid the $5.00 for parking.  (That's not extortionate for parking, but The Ticket should say something about that in their promotions since they stress that the event is free.  Maybe that's why they always stress it's "free to enter."  It's not free to arrive, but free to walk in the door.)

I will confess, Confessors, that I was rather startled.  I had prepared The Girl for a milling, noisy, T-fueled crowd.

But the crowd was very sparse; not a "crowd" at all.  There was a group of people sitting on the ground in front of the stage listening to (and enjoying) the round table, but the surrounding floor in the convention hall was pretty empty.

And there was a lot of floor to be seen.  The number of vendors with displays there was way down from the last time I was at a Friday Ticketstock presentation.  No need to place them in rows, there weren't enough of them to make up rows.

Just a strange vibe.  Despite the rich possibilities for TicketChick costuming from the Eighties theme, they appeared to be wearing the same outfits they'd worn a few years before when the theme was supposedly "Mardi Gras" (although I recall zero promotion for that at the time).  The three I encountered a couple of times seemed a little unsure of what they were supposed to be doing.

And in the past, they had moved bleachers up to an area in front of the stage to accommodate people who wanted to listen to the show.  On Friday, the bleachers sat unused against a far wall and people who wanted to listen (you had to be directly in line with the speakers -- a little off to the side and all you could hear was Corby's keening howler-monkey larf) had to sit on the ground or stand.

Now I'm thinking a couple of things here in possible mitigation:

(1) Maybe vendors figure Saturday is the big day so in these uncertain times they don't pop for two days, and there were a lot more on Saturday.  What was the vendor/booth situation like on Saturday?

(2) Maybe people were holding off until Saturday because they'd moved the TimeWasters' performance.  All the headliners were for Saturday.  I heard Junior say Saturday morning that they were expecting the biggest crowd in the history of TicketStock that day, but when I tuned in around 5 that afternoon I thought I picked up one of the Roundtablers making a sideways reference to a thin crowd, and there was little crowd noise being picked up.  How was the Saturday crowd?

(3) Maybe the bleachers were really only for the TimeWasters' performance in the past and so had not been put in place on Friday, and they got moved up on Saturday.

I applaud The Ticket's community outreach with its Guys Nights Out (Guys Night Outs?) and Ticketstock and all the rest.  I've enjoyed them all in the past.  But this one seemed a little denatured, a little dispirited and frankly, a little half-assed.

But give me your experience, and set me straight.  I'm thinking Friday was an outlier and that things must have turned around on Saturday.

The Girl was puzzled.

LATER:

ERROR ERROR ERROR:  Just heard Jake and Sean, whose reportage I trust, talking about how the crowds were amazing Friday night and also Saturday, bigger on Friday than Saturday, even.  Biggest Ticketstock ever.  So I must have gone at a quiet time, sample size too small.

Your Source for Quality Ticket Journalism regrets its misleading analysis.

Alert Snopes.

FURTHER:  To see how way wrong I was, see NTexas's sister's photos in the cut-and-paste link in the first comment.  Thanks much for that.  Man, I shoulda hung on.

"If You're Going to Irving, Texas . . . [+ an MTC Milestone]

.  .  .  be sure to wear some flowers in your hair."

So, who's going to Ticketstock?

I try to make it if I can.  I've been to three or four, but missed the last one.  Both Fridays and Saturdays are a little tough.  I'd love to come tomorrow night, but  .  .  .

.  .  .  there's The Girl.

The Girl may not want to go to Ticketstock.

And I can't ditch The Girl even in the service of my crucial journalistic duties.

Well, how about Saturday?

Saturday carries with it chores during most of the day and then  .  .  .

.  .  .  The Girl will need to be fed and entertained.

On the other hand, The Girl might be OK with Ticketstock.

Something a little different.

So I'm asking myself how I might be able to meet some Confessors there. I don't think I want to just hang in one spot, and besides, I don't know what hang-likely spots there will be around the Irving Convention Center.

Tell you what: if I go tomorrow, I will wear a purple tie. If I go Saturday, I'll wear a Ragonk t-shirt under a sport jacket (and maybe an unbuttoned long-sleeved shirt, if it's chilly).  I'll probably also have a 35mm DSLR with a big honkin' flash on it.  If you see someone matching that description, just stand in the general vicinity and say, loudly enough for that person to hear, "Plainsman?" And I'll be glad to say howdy.

Whether we meet or not, have a fun, safe time at Ticketstock. Give more than serious thought to a designated driver. And thank you for shopping at My Ticket Confession.

*     *     *

LATER:  I am delighted to note that today's offering is the 800th post in My Ticket Confession.  Hard to believe.  Includes the occasional archival post, but I'll count 'em.    

Partial stable of MTC models poses for a group shot during TimeWasters' break.

I Only Caught a Few Seconds, But I Could Swear . . .

.  .  .  that Becca is back with Stick-It-Up-Your-Tailpipe Traffic!

I'll rush to take this post down if I find out that I'm wrong.

But for those few seconds, my sinuses cleared, plaque shattered and fell from my teeth, and the fog lifted from my spectacles.

That voice, what an instrument for good on Cool Metro's roadways, and the world.

So welcome back, Becca.  If you're back.

More Country Force, Please

Country Force, starring Ty Walker and Eli Jordan, is rapidly becoming one of my favorite shows on The Ticket -- JV and varsity.  So far it's been something of a pirate show, an ad hoc fill-in when some JV show can't make it onto the air for one reason or another.

However, yesterday we were treated to a Country Force Hall of Fame show on the late-Saturday-afternoon graveyard shift.  A really enjoyable listen on a nothingburger topic.  That's hard to do.  Giving the lads a bonus Ticket "special" to host is a step in the right direction.

In addition to finding both Ty and Eli enjoyable radio presences, I am attracted to the show because there is so little BS in it.  This is a show that gets to the sports point, has almost no time for current events, and states its positions plainly without a lot of back-filling and ass-covering and excuse-making.  On more than one of the current offerings (weekday and weekend) I'm finding my finger hovering over the PO button pretty much the entire show.

Country Force comes blowing through the speakers like a cleansing prairie wind.

CONFIDENTIAL TO THE WESTERN-HEMISPHERICAL CATMAN:   Consider jiggering the Saturday lineup to give us a regularly-scheduled CF, or add it as original Ticket content on Sunday.  Make it the go-to fill-in show when a weekday show is on vacation.

Hell, I'll sponsor the thing.

Ty Walker is never underwater.

Someday, Eli Jordan will have his own Fathead.

I Could Kick Myself for Not Bringing a Camera

[Tight Ends photo cribbed from the Internet Web will appear clear down at the end of this thing so cubicle dwellers will have plenty of time to see it coming and avoid it.]

As you know from the last thread, I made my way to Guys Night Out on Wednesday.  Looks like I missed East Texas P1, or he missed me.  Sorry, ETP1.

I don't have anything to say about The Ticket presentation because I didn't spend any time in that room.  I had a meeting in Frisco that afternoon, so got there around 4:15 or so, and the place was already packed.  I was by myself.

Noticed something I've never noticed at a Ticket remote, which was that they were taking names at the door, apparently for people to wait for reserved tables.  That wasn't objectionable, not to me, anyway, but it did somewhat detract from the informality of the occasion.  Perhaps it's a way to control the crowd in the part of the bar where the tables are.

If so, I violated the policy because the first thing I did was to walk into the room where The Hardline was broadcasting and stroll around between the tables, see if I saw any friendly faces at a table where I might linger for a bit until either I was invited to sit down, or I asked if I could join the group if they didn't seem too put out at this strange-looking guy.  (I had a suit on from my meeting; did loosen my tie, though.)  But didn't see any likely candidates (sorry ETP1, I didn't wander too close to the broadcast), so thought I would move away from the action at least to find a place to sit.  I saw some tables with "RESERVED" signs on them, but way in the back in the far room there were a number of empty tables with no signs, so I sat myself down.

Before continuing my not-very-interesting GNO story, I pause to reflect on the Tight Ends wait staff.  I don't know -- should I feel sorry for them?  Some extremely attractive young women, some pushing the needle over into beautiful, but most dressed as revealingly as North Plano community standards will allow, and some beyond.  I'm not a prude and I derive about the same amount of enjoyment as most males in viewing a woman wearing something that approaches the borders of the naughty bits.  And I really liked looking at these young women.  Yeah, really did.  Hey, look at that one  .  .  .  .  and whoa, looka tha --    But [shaking head to clear thinking and conscience] jeez -- pasties, thongs, some items whose names I don't know, some items that appear improvised and nameless, aimed at enticing the male to stay, spend money, tip lavishly, dream foolishly.  So one line of my thinking is -- man, we haven't come very far since the Fifties as far as exploitation of women is concerned.

But the other line of thinking is that these women are volunteers.  They were not pressed into service shortly after getting off the boat.  They put in their application, they get hired, they know what they're going to be required to wear (although there didn't seem to be a particular uniform, a fair amount of improvisation seemed to be de rigueur).  They're working, working hard.  I'm guessing the P1 crowd isn't going to be too forward.  (Also guessing there's security in place.)  Some may be single mothers.  Some may be a young wife making sure that mortgage gets paid.   Others may be students.  Perhaps models.  Maybe some professional women or administrative types in between jobs or picking up some extra dough.  But whatever they are, they all gotta eat, pay the rent, buy gas, and a day like that is probably good money for each of them.  Someone is going to make money off men's unconquerable urge to self-delude, and maybe they figure it might as well be them.

So -- no judgment, just curiosity.

I will say this -- they didn't seem very happy.  Photos below to the contrary.

As it turned out, I was served by a comely blonde named Stephanie who was more modestly dressed than most.  She took my order, and she had just stepped away when I was accosted by another waitress who asked me if I just sat down at the table without putting my name in at the front.  I confessed (of course) immediately.  She told me I couldn't sit there.  OK, whatever the rules are, don't want to cause trouble or take cuts over a deserving P1 who was waiting for a table, but GNO was getting to be more of a challenge than I really cared to deal with.  I rose to try to find a spot at the bar and got Stephanie's attention to tell her where I was going, and she said "Sit down, you're fine.  It's my table."  She then sought out the other waitress and, I gather, they had a chinwag and my eviction was abated.

While the wait staff seemed rather morose, the trio of brunette Ticket Chicks who stopped by to sign me up for a drawing were very cheerful and quite attractive, all three of them.  If I'd had my wits about me I'd have interviewed them on the life and career path of a Ticket Chick, which strikes me as a great topic for a post.  I'm something of a camera guy, if not an accomplished photographer, and am almost never without some decent glass, but yesterday found me lensless.   (Phone camera busted.)   So I got nothing for you on the three lovely Chicks.  The last time I got involved with a drawing at a remote (it was purchased raffle tickets, not just a sign-up), I won several times and the grand prize of Mavs courtside seats.  See:  http://myticketconfession.blogspot.com/2012/12/duckandcover-goes-out-on-some.html 

This time I did not win.

Well, this was a pretty dreary entry, wasn't it?  I did enjoy just hanging out there, chatting with the Ticket Chicks, having a couple, reading.  Next time I'll try to be better prepared, maybe give you guys some better notice so we can find each other.

Not sure if I'll make Ticketstock, but I hope to stop by sometime.  Hope to see you there.  Photos liberated from the Internet (and these were some of the more conventionally revealing ones) follow the jump  .  .  .  .

See You at Tight Ends Tonight . . . . [[CORRECTION -- PLAINSMAN ERROR]

.  .  .  the most exploitative sports bar in North Plano. [[CORRECTION:  The birthday is today, but Tight Ends Guy's Night Out is tomorrow, Wednesday, January 25.   Thanks to Confessors East Texas P1 and Anon 1012 for pointing out my error.]]

And a very Happy Birthday to the radio station that keeps us entertained, if not exactly informed, KTCK 1301 AM and ninety-six seven FM.

Ben + Skin + Travis Frederick

Really, really good.  Forget about how Frederick's presence elevates B&S into listenability -- we're hearing a guy who will have a long broadcasting career after his football days are over.

All right, this post is a give-up.  I've been absolutely slammed and feeling very, very bad that I haven't given the faithful Confessor any fresh content in way too long.  Please accept my apologies.  I've got a contribution from a Confessor in the hopper, but I haven't even gotten to that.

So, uh, leave some comments or stuff.

Do We Have a New Ticket Announcer Man?

Heard a new voice doing the station ID this morning.  Nice voice.  No Conrad, but a nice voice.

Are we hearing the last of Conrad and those appalling, unfunny, 5th-grade-snickering-in-the-boys-room gags he's forced to recite?

I note from the archives that Conrad seemed to take a break back in July of 2014 and some of the time-sensitive promos were recorded by someone else pending his return.  But the thing I heard today was not a time-sensitive promo -- it was THE station ID liner.

So if we've heard the last of Conrad -- best of luck.  Drop me a line, why doncha?  We'll do a 20 Questions or AMA or something.

By the way:  His name is Jim Conrad, and here he is with Craig "Junior" Miller doing a bit at 2011 Ticketstock:

And Becca, good luck to you, wherever you are.

ThePlainsman1310@gmail.com

@Plainsman1310

Can't Afford to Lose a Single Confessor . . .

.  .  .  so have the very safest of Happy New Years. 

I've got a topic list of articles to get to, trying to figure out which ones engage me and might engage you.

Well, after a couple of weeks, what do we think about the DryDock offerings?  The Shake Joint is pretty much a known quantity by this time and Jake and Sean are pretty polished content providers.  In general, I thought it was very good with a few fairly insignificant lapses that I chalk up to differences in taste (mine and theirs) rather than any real deficiencies.  Pretty nice little show they've got.

I really liked Jake and David Newbury on the Cowboys pregame, and I think we'll have them again tomorrow morning, although there seems to be some speculation that Jake might struggle for a timely arrival.

The wild card of the shows was Not a Podcast, their first lengthy stretch that I can recall, given the very plum PM Drive assignment, prime placement, long shows.  There seems to be two schools of thought on the show and hosts.  What do you all think?  Particulars, please, and keep it civil.  Want to hear from those who liked it, not just those who didn't.

Thanks for reading this year.  Back soon.

The Merriest of Christmases to All Confessors -- and BREAKING: Latest Ratings No Christmas Surprise (see Comment 3)

And I am feeling so Christmassy that I extend that greeting to all of my trolls, who seem to be decreasing somewhat in number and virulence as time goes by.  May they all be visited by three spirits tonight  .  .  .  .

Been a bit of a rough year for Your Plainsman, but things improving quite a bit as year-end approaches.  Hope you and your loved ones have a lovely Eve and Day.

Enjoying your predictions and DryDock reactions, so let's keep that going.

All in the holiday spirit, of course.

Some Predictions from the Archives -- Let's Have Yours

A Google member called "Blogger" has been posting ads for porn sites on old comment threads.  Not much I can do about it than go to them and delete them.  The only upside of this is that it gives me a chance to revisit some old posts, and better, your comments.

The following predictions appeared four years ago tomorrow (December 19, 2012).  Some of them are out of date, but the Ticket has changed so little in that time that a lot of them actually still make sense (if not funny sense), so thought I'd rerun them for a giggle, as Gordon would say.  These appeared in one of my comments to a post featuring (1) my live blogging of winning of three different raffle drawings at Scruffy Duffies, including the grand prize, and (2) the predictions of a former Confessor named duckandcover.

So  .  .  .  what do you think will happen at The Little One in 2017?  I'll accept gags, serious prognostication, and naked wishes.

Here ya go:

(1) Michael Gruber, Dirk Nowitzki, Brian Cuban, and Weekend Tickerman Mitchell Kerasik will form a consortium and purchase The Ticket from Cumulus for an undisclosed sum and a ham sandwich. Grubes will assume control over station management and will permanently reassign Jeff Catlin to oversee the constant replenishment of BaD’s and Norm’s stable of interns.

(2) Gordon will permanently lose all of his endorsements when he blurts out that he’s never actually been to Raising Cane’s.

(3) Sometime in late spring or early summer, an episode of “What’s on Mike’s Mind” will air without Mike uttering a single syllable.

(4) Cumulus will announce that it’s working on improving The Ticket’s signal.

(5) Corby will join the professional marathon circuit. Will run into trouble with his first urine test when he tests negative for urine.

(6) Richie Whitt will modestly admit that yes, it’s true, he’s dating Megan Fox’s cuter sister.

(7) The Hardline will take a call.

(8) The International System of Units will announce that the frequency of the sound of Bob Sturm’s voice has been determined to vary so little from high to low that it will replace caesium-133 radiation cycles as the basis for the atomic clock upon which modern timekeeping is based. When informed of this, Bob will say: “Awesome.”

(9) The fragile edifice of host solidarity will begin to crumble when one of them casually mentions that he’s considering non-renewing his endorsement deal with All-Pro Foundation Repair to pursue other interests.

(10) Craig Rosengarden will kick George DiGianni’s ass.

(11) Craig "Junior" Miller will tragically violate Johnny Carson's "Comedy Rule of One Too Many" when, incorrectly perceiving that his self-nickname "The Joonz" has achieved widespread humor acceptance, he further shortens it to "the Joo" and is hounded off the air by the Anti-Defamation League.

(12) George Dunham will drop his opposition to fracking when the largest self-contained source of domestic methane is discovered under his vast real estate holdings in East Jeebus or wherever the hell it is he's moved off to, which BP geologists will name "the Jub Outgassing" in his honor.

(13) Outraged P1's will finally have had enough and will dognap SweetJack and haul him off to Man's Best Friend, where his irrepressibly cheerful bargain-flogging will result in his severe mauling by a pack of previously docile six-toed Norwegian lundehunds.

 Y'all have a Merry Christmas 2016, if I don't post before then, or even if I do.  -- Plainsman

So What's the Deal with All This Tension?

And during the feelgood holidays, at that?

Let's review:

Mike Sirois v. T.C. Fleming:   T.C. holding forth at length on some aspect of coolness relating to cleats, and Sirois just flat sutting him down.

T.C. Fleming v. John Fahy:   I heard that exchange this morning at the beginning of That Certain Shake Joynt.  T.C. took his "competently produced" shot, and Fahy absolutely unloaded on him at his next opportunity, noting T.C.'s history of occasional marblemouthedness during Tickers, his BaD Radio sycophancy, and other sins.

Jake Kemp v. Unidentified Shake Joint Guy:  I missed the first few minutes of the show, but it sounded like Jake was wrapping up some fairly specific put-down of someone working on the show that morning, but I got in late couldn't identify the victim of his wrath.  Please advise if you know who it was.

Gordon Keith v. Mike Sirois: About Mike's mother, no less, and what I gather was speculation on her sexual history.  I caught just a little of this on Monte + The Machine yesterday so might not have that quite right -- corrections welcome.  (Those M+M boys do like to stir things up, don't they?)

Jake Kemp v. John Fahy:  After gently chiding his pal T.C. for his "silly" and "uncool" remarks about John, he noted that in listening to the latter's Top Ten work, he observed that Fahy would sometimes eliminate the actual punch line of the segment being featured, but sometimes include the 40-liner.   Tending to support T.C.'s judgment.

What's going on?  No idea; however, I wonder if it has something to do with the fact that the established hosts aren't likely to go anywhere for a long time unless someone retires early or dies, and you have a generation of JV that's been there a long time with no advancement.

The Ass Ceiling:  You keep these ambitious, intelligent guys down long enough with so very few opportunities to shine on-air, and the jockeying for position can become pretty intense.

Could be something else -- some event behind the scenes that's caused some lines to be drawn among The Next Generation.

 

I thought you'd enjoy a post that wasn't about advertising.

Please Check In with White Elephant Reactions Today

The Ticket has turned White Elephant Day into glorified round tables, since every guy is in his accustomed role as host, producer, Tickerman, etc.  More bits, that's about the only difference.

Still worth listening to, if only for the bits. 

I'm going to try to listen as much as I can, but would rather hear from you.

White Elephant Day is one of the biggest days of the year for visits to this site -- most of them, I suspect, from JV, although with JV now relegated to typical JV tasks, they'll probably check in less to see what people think of them. 

In any event, keep your comments thoughtful, please -- you never know who might be watching.

Thanks.

Fred Garvin, Man About Town, on Ticket Advertising

Confessor Fred Garvin, Man About Town, emailed me some thoughts on some themes regular Confessors will find familiar.  I know not everyone is anxious to read more about Ticket advertising on this site, and most of these ads have been dissected here before, but I am very thankful, in this season for being thankful, for contributions from readers.  And Fred has some interesting takes, not all of which I share, but, hey, that's why they make vanilla and Cherry Garcia. 

But I do like the "sci-fi collectibles" line and the Jimmy John's ads featuring Ed.

Okay, okay, I'll try to give advertising commentary a break for awhile, although I may not be able to resist a new post on not-known-as-The-Bulldog Kelly McClure sometime soon.

*     *     *

I’ve got a few random thoughts on Ticket advertising.

First, do no harm: There are two Ticket sponsors whose advertisements make me want to spend lavishly...on their competitors. First is Meador Dodge Chrysler, etc. (“We simply do it better, at Meador.”) This is the satirical one: Unethical sales guy sticks the customer with exotic, needless up-charges, while the customer complains futilely, sounding vaguely like one of the grown-ups in the Charlie Brown cartoons.

ANNOYING. Not funny. Over-the-top in a way that would make Jim Carrey blush. And played way, way too often.

The second one is Del Frisco’s Double Eagle Steak House. The guy isn’t the problem. Gina Cook is the problem. (Don’t throw shoes. I know that some people like her, but she’s nails on the chalkboard for me.) And the problem is her barely contained giddiness at how funny she thinks she’s being. Each commercial, she’s on the verge of “breaking,” as they say in show biz. Breaking is normally fun for the audience, because we’re laughing, and we get a kick out of watching the talent try not to laugh, too. But it’s less fun when we’re not laughing, and instead are wondering, “Why does Gina think this is so funny?” (Side note: Gina doesn’t have the vocal timbre to say, “Crab claws...yeah!” at 75% of her maximum volume. My recommendation: Let the dude say it, or drop the line altogether.)

Now please don’t get me wrong: I love humor in advertising. I’ve found the Jimmy John’s spots (fast delivery, fast talking) amusing. And there’s the one ad with the line, “Please don’t handle the sci-fi collectibles.” But those ads are smart and know their audience. The Meador and Del Frisco ads are pedestrian and tone-deaf. Revise and resubmit, please. 

Bart Reagor, are you okay? We haven’t heard from this guy in a while, and it’s got me wondering if he decided to take a mental health break in the country. ‘Cuz those ads he was doing a while back were getting downright weird. There was this bit: “You like the Internet? Remember when we didn’t have that? Remember when we would just stare at our computer screens and wish the Internet would be invented? And then it got invented, and we all liked it? Do you remember that?” And how about the stuff where he sounds like he’s trying to talk his girlfriend out of dumping him: “I’m one of the best guys you’ll ever meet. Give me a chance. Don’t be a hater...” I sometimes wonder how many of these spots are cut with Bart speaking directly into the mirror.

Learning from your mistakes. Occasionally, I wake up in the middle of the night, screaming, thinking about that first Kelly McClure “bulldog” spot. Wow, was that bad. I did the math once, and she said the word “aggressive” 2.4 times per second in that thing. She also invited you to check out her pics online (which of course I did, purely for medicinal purposes, and while she’s lovely, the “hire me b/c I’m hot” pitch is kind of insulting). The whole campaign was in your face like whipped cream at a pie-eating contest. It also reinforced a lot of ugly stereotypes about lawyers.

Thankfully, Ms. McClure has toned things way down. I like the softer Kelly.

All I can say is, well done. Good things happen when you’re not too proud to learn.

A Happy Thanksgiving to All Confessors

Hope it is a safe and happy one for you all and that you can spend it with loved ones other than the ones with stars on their helmets.

While I have liked hearing The Hardline this morning, I could not believe that they replayed "Thanksgiving Loves the White Man," composed and performed some years back by Corby Davidson.  I suppose they play it every year, but I've never heard it before.  Hitting a woman -- an "Injun 'hore" -- with a rolling pin and a frying pan wasn't funny in the 90's and it's not funny now. 

The Ticket lost countless timeless drops in the move to Victory but for some reason this ordure survived.

If The Musers are listening, they must be horrified that their hearty laughter at this bilge -- it was when Corby was on with them in the morning for some reason -- has been preserved for the ages.

CONFIDENTIAL TO JEFF CATLIN:  Get this piece of crap out of heavy Thanksgiving rotation.

Other than that -- pretty good little show.

The "Stay In Your Silo" Theory Results in a Snoring White Elephant

Early reviews on the White Elephant drawing are not enthusiastic.

Interesting that Cat has required that hosts stay hosts, producers stay producers, no participation by weekend JV.

Any organization will inevitably segment itself into castes -- remember high school "cliques"? -- who tend to stick together, excluding those in lesser castes and yearning to be accepted into the greater castes.

The "silo theory" eliminates the possibility that the resulting tension will add any interest to White Elephant day.  It might end up being fun, always enjoyable to hear guys who don't hang together too much do a show.

But it will be pretty  .  .  .  white.

PROGRAM NOTE: BREAKING: Country Force in for That Shake Joint Thang

Starring Ty Walker and Eli Jordan.  Good stuff.

Wish I'd Had a Camera So I Could Have Sent the Picture to George

On Friday night I was at Klyde Warren Park to watch the simulcast of the Dallas Opera's production of "Moby Dick."

(Capsule review:  Resolutely forgettable score, bombastic and sometimes obscure libretto, but a very evocative symphonic orchestration during the non-vocal passages, and great musical and dramatic performances with some charismatic actors (Jay Hunter Morris (Ahab) is from Paris, Texas), and gorgeous and astounding stagecraft that made an impact even half a football field away on screen, worth sitting through the about-45-minutes-too-long opera.)

Jody Dean was serving as a kind of Klyde Warren Park emcee.  During the intermission, he and another person whose name I didn't catch were asking what they called "trivia questions" about the first act to (mostly) little kids and a few adults.

One of the adults was a guy named Philip.

He was wearing an old-style Ticket t-shirt.

Jody took note.  I don't recall his exact words but they were to the effect that "couldn't you have found a KLUV t-shirt?" OWTTE.  I don't recall Philip's response, but he did answer the opera question correctly.

Anyone else see this?

"Call me Trishmael."

Can You Believe That, Having Thrashed Cool Metro for Weeks with One Hidden Cost Motors Ad Starring Bob, Meador Dodge Chrysler Jeep Ram Has Ordered Another One of these Abominations?

Confessors, I've been burning the proverbial candle at both of its proverbial ends lately, barely time to do normal adult living stuff, much less compose deathless MTC articles.  I hope I'll emerge from this miasma shortly, but until then, get a new thread rolling, will you please?  Thanks.

Yr Plainsman

Why I Hope At Least One of Terrell McClain, Geoff Swaim, or (Unlikely) Rolando McClain, Becomes An Enormous Star for the Cowboys

Time for a spot of fun.  Maybe only for me, but at least I will enjoy it.

This week The Musers took a swing at a motto Dak Prescott.  Junior got it started with "We're going Dak to the future," and George chimed in with "Once you go Dak, you'll never go back."

I've got a couple to suggest myself.  One of which will almost certainly die on this page except as a source of ridicule directed at Your Plainsman, the other of which has some chance of showing up on a poster at a game, if Jerry even allows posters in that dump.

The first one requires a bit of history, children, so sit back  .  .  .  .

There once was a major league baseball team called the Boston Braves.  The team eventually moved to Milwaukee and then to Atlanta, but in the years we care about, the post-war 40's and even into the 50's, it was the National League team in Boston.

During those years, the Braves had two superior pitchers -- Warren Spahn and Johnny Sain.  You can look them up, but for our purposes they provided the Braves with a devastating 1-2 punch at the top of the rotation.

Once, during the pennant drive in 1948, they put together a remarkable run, aided by the weather.  They swept a double header.  After two days off, there was a rainout.  Spahn came back and won, and the next day, Sain won.  Three days later, Spahn won, and then Sain won again.  After an off day, the two pitchers were designated again, and they both won again.  Together, they went 8-0 in 12 days.  We'll come back to that in a moment.

Spahn went on to have the more memorable career, but Sain was a 20-game winner four times.  He threw the last pitch to Babe Ruth in an organized game (in 1943 in an exhibition game between major leaguers managed by Ruth and a team made up of servicemen, including Ted Williams).  Ruth walked.  He also threw the first major league pitch to Jackie Robinson, who grounded out to short.

Sain died in 2006.  Spahn, who died in 2003, won 20 games or more in 13 seasons.  He's the top all-time southpaw winner with 363 wins.  He went 23-7 when he was 42, and pitched 382 complete games.  Times have changed.

But returning to 1948 and that remarkable run.  It inspired Boston Post sports editor Gerald Hern to dash off a catchy little poem:

     First we'll use Spahn
     then we'll use Sain
     Then an off day
     followed by rain
     Back will come Spahn
     followed by Sain
     And followed
     we hope
     by two days of rain.

This got shortened to the phrase (I hope) many of you will recall hearing that became the rallying cry for that 1948 team:  

"Spahn and Sain and pray for rain."

It became very famous -- Spahn later said:  "It's not so much my pitching people know, but that little poem about me and Johnny Sain with the forty-eight Braves."  It even became a commercial slogan:

The Braves won the NL Pennant that year, but fell in six games in the World Series to, of all teams, the Cleveland Indians.

What has all of this to do with The Ticket?  I began this post recalling Craig's and George's efforts to put something together in the way of a catch-slogan for this year's Cowboys.  It got me thinking and I came up with this, referencing Sean Lee, Terrell McClain, and Dak.  It's cute, but really only works if McClain rises to some kind of dominance.  After an interesting pre-season, Geoff Swain seems to have vanished, but I can hope -- his name actually works best, because I can throw an "and" in there, and it's a funnier name so I'll use that, but we may have to go back to "McClain" if Geoff never sees the gridiron, and "McClain" is really a better rhyme.  

Ready?

"Sean and Swaim and pray for Rayne."

ALTERNATIVE:  "Sean, McClain, and pray for Rayne."

OK, it's a stretch.

Here's another one.

Back when the New Orleans Saints were good in the early 80's they had a rallying cry:  "Who dat?  Who dat?  Who dat say dey gonna beat dem Saints?"  The Neville Brothers actually recorded a song with that theme with some Saints players, shortened to "Who Dat Gonna Beat Dem Saints?"  Fans took it up as a cry of solidarity at games.  Despite its minstrel origins, the Saints even adopted it as an official slogan.

You're way ahead of me:

"Who Dak?  Who Dak?  Who Dak Gonna Lead Dem 'Boys?"  

(or "'Pokes," or "Cowboys," if we can't say "Boys" anymore, even if there's no racial implication).

[[CORRECTION:  As the Ticket Drop might say, "WELL F_____ ME!"  I don't subscribe to Sports Illustrated and so didn't know that this particular gag had already been made.  I did a search for the "who dak" phrase before writing this, and nothing popped up, so I thought there was some chance it was original.  Guess not.  Sorry.]]

Enough -- some of you might say more than enough -- of this wordplay.  I hope we have all learned something and perhaps even inspired some of you to top this (not a big challenge, I know).

Didn't like this post?  Oh, all right, here you go:

"Oh, but Plainsman, I like lots of wordplay."

ThePlainsman1310@gmail.com

@Plainsman1310 

PROGRAM NOTE: Country Force (Ty Walker, Eli Jordan) in for Cirque Today at Noon

Check it out. 

Hey, Country Force, can you fix my chain?

Time for a Little Refresher

Back at the beginning of 2015, this site was getting cluttered with bad, dumb comments, stuff that you see on other sites but I was determined to keep off this one.  So I published a set of "Rules of the Confessional" and urged all persons thinking of commenting to read and heed.

I was very gratified to see an immediate uptick in the quality of comments and a downtick in the number I had to delete.

But this is the Political Season, and the exaggerated emotions that seem to accompany it are starting to seep into the comments.  I had to take down 3-4 comments in the last string.  So I thought it might be time to reprise those rules.

Truth to tell, many of the comments I don't like are a result of the regrettable increase in sociopolitical talk on The Ticket itself.  I loathe it.  Yes, even the Musers are straying into it more than I find enjoyable as I drag a sharp blade across my lathered face in the morning.  So to that extent, politics is fair game -- but please keep your ire, or praise, directed at the shows, and not at your fellow Confessor, who, if you knew him or her, you would probably like quite a lot.

Since a lot of what I was complaining about back then is no longer such a problem here, these rules may look dated.  But I've only tweaked them a little since the original Rules were published.  (The original Rules also announced a moratorium on T.C. talk, which has since been lifted.)
 
Thank You for Shopping at My Ticket Confession, and I hope your candidate wins.  Text of 2015 Rules follows the asterisk.

*     *     *

Attend, O Confessors.

This is intended to be a site for people who like The Ticket.  Maybe they have an issue here and there, but, in general, I want Confessors to be fans, or, as they have come to be known, "The P1."

I want people to like coming here and know they're going to be treated with respect, or at least not put down by witless, content-free snark.

And, should a Ticket employee wander by, I want them to come away with the impression that they've been in the company of people who care about the station and think carefully about their reactions to it -- not a bunch of snippy teenagers.

So forgive me if I advise that I'm weary of refereeing pissy little flame wars between readers who can't express themselves without taking a shot at others. 

And weary as well of visitors who apparently don't like anything about The Ticket, this site, or Your Plainsman.

Or don't forgive me.  Don't care.

My past warnings have gone unheeded.  So, much as I hate to do it, I'm cracking down.

Accordingly:

1.   Shots.   No criticisms of the person of any prior commenter.  If you have a disagreement, express your view in a way that addresses the issue or the facts or the opinion.  However, even brief phrases:

   --   impugning intelligence or motives of a prior commenter;

   --   asserting that prior commenters are all the same guy;

   --   suggesting that a prior commenter lacks reading or comprehension skills;

   --   suggesting that a commenter hasn't listened to the station enough, or for long enough, or is otherwise not a good Ticket citizen;

   --   is generally nasty towards another,

will cause your entire confession to hit the pail instantly.  It's too time consuming to edit your stuff for content.  Criticism of opinions is OK, but do it by making your own supportable point or making a legitimate debater's criticism of the prior comment.

I don't care how good your confession is in other respects.  The most brilliant comment that contains a phrase like "here's a thought -- listen to the station" will get bounced.

Subjective?  Absolutely.  Here's a rule of thumb:  Read your post before you send it.  If you see a phrase which, if it were said about you would upset you and make you want to respond in kind -- take it out.

2.    Vulgarity.  Don't use it.

3.    Tone.  Angry, hateful, threatening, overly emotional comments -- out.  I'm serious about all of these comments, and this one may seem slight, but I'm telling you:  Tone it down.

4.    Name-Calling.  Applies not just to fellow Confessors, but to anyone.  

5.    Stuff That's Just Too Wrong.  The other day got a comment from a guy ragging on T.C. and Corby.  Same old stuff, didn't like it, but met the standards in effect at that time.  Was going to publish, then noticed that he seemed to think that the midday host's name was "Stern."

[5.5  (added 03-07-15):  Commentary on subjects' personal lives is strongly discouraged.  Exceptions may be made if the matter relates to on-air events.]

6.   Anything That Strikes Me As Designed to Pick a Fight.  You figure it out.

Here's a further suggestion:  Cut and paste your comment into a file before sending it.  If your comment appears and then disappears, I've made it go away.   If you still think it's worthwhile, go back and figure out why I bounced it.  Fix it and repost.

Guys, I'm sorry about this, but I'm even sorrier that the comments have gotten so sorry.  I'd say a good third to a fourth of the comments that I published on the last thread would not have made it under the foregoing standards. [Again -- this was written in January 2015; comment does not apply to recent threads.]

You will be amazed at how easy it is to express your point of view -- even one that is critical of the point of a prior comment -- without impugning the character or talents of your fellows on this site.

Don't write me complaining about my judgment on comments.  I'm not interested.  You want the objective standard of unfettered commentary, there are other homes for you on the plains of the Internet.

This means you.

Come on now.  Let's keep this site going.  Let's make it a place that attracts the attention of people who matter and where you can be heard without bringing a bunch of cheap crap down on your head.

And let's have some fun.

Thank you for shopping at My Ticket Confession.

*     *     *

ThePlainsman1310@gmail.com

@Plainsman1310

BREAKING: Changes at ESPN

Per Anonymous at 7:06p on September 24:

Per Reddit, Mosely and Friedo out at ESPN.

Steve Dennis to replace Mosely on Afternoon Show.

Friedo-Dennis to be replaced by Jean-Jacques Taylor and an unnamed partner.

This is all I have on this, and if it turns out to be in error, apologies in advance.   My thanks to 706 Anonymous, unless it's wrong.

I liked Cowlishaw and Mosely, but I think Steve Dennis and Tim Cowlishaw will be worth a listen.

Interesting -- in the last thread, I was wondering if Dennis might find a home as a host somewheres.  I speculate that this has nothing to do with these changes.

UPDATE:  Looks like Anonymous had the goods.

http://sportsday.dallasnews.com/other-sports/moresports/2016/09/23/matt-mosley-espn-1033

Article places Will Chambers with JJT.  Looks like JJT was reporting on his assignment via Facebook on Friday, so I'm a little behind the times here.

A Couple of Quick HIts to Get a New Thread Going -- UPDATED [2]

(1) My schedule has changed so I'm sometimes not in the car as much during drive, so my Hardline listening has diminished a bit.  When I tuned in this past week, I have to say, I enjoyed the show.  I thought the Danny rat story was overrated, but they did some car talk that got me laughing, and it seemed to me that I heard More Mike than I'd heard in recent months, which always makes for a better show.

(2) I sometimes punch over to ESPN, and heard something that I really liked on Monday afternoon:  a couple of hours of "Football Firing Line," which I guess has been going on for awhile.  It was Tim Cowlishaw and Matt Mosley, the usual Afternoon Show hosts, with Steve Dennis, Nate Newton, and another guy whose name I wrote down and now I can't find the slip.  The Internets say Ed Werder is on the panel, but it wasn't him, it was an AA with a four-letter first name, a middle initial, and a last name.  One of you guys can tell me who it was.  [UPDATE 2:  The other guy had a four letter last name:  Clarence E. Hill, Jr., of the Star-Telegram.]  Anyway, I thought it was a lot of fun with some trenchant Cowboys analysis thrown in for good measure.

What's the story on Steve Dennis, anyway?  He seems pretty spicy and zero-BS but it seems all he does is fill in around the Dallas sports media scene from time to time.  Would he make a good full-time host somewheres?

(3) Danny has a great radio voice, but in recent months it's gotten rough and a little breathy and sometimes cracks, as though perhaps he smokes and perhaps smokes a lot.  (I don't know if he smokes.)  Maybe he's been performing a lot.  (You can tell when Mike's not far past a Petty Theft performance -- his voice gets noticeably tired.)  Maybe he has to yell a lot at the Twilite Lounge.  Maybe he's using a different mic or he's getting EQ'd so the treble is turnt up.  His habits are none of MTC's business; I'm just saying his on-air sound has frayed some.

(4)  UPDATE:  Hey, how long has Matt McClearin been hosting the Cowboys post-game on ESPN?  (Since there's only been one other game, I would think that's probably the answer.)  Maybe the better question is, how long has Matt McClearin been working at KESN?   I punch over from Norm and Donovan once in awhile just to see what's airing on ESPN or The Fan, and he was running the show (it sounded like) with Steve Dennis and Tim McMahon, if I caught it correctly.  I thought it was pretty good.

I knew that he and Scot Harrison had lost their WJOX Birmingham show back in July but hadn't heard anything further.  Since Cumulus is operating KESN, maybe Jeff C welcomed him back.  (Scot's LinkedIn page says that he's "Director of Marketing and Public Relations at Taco Mama."  Matt's says that he's "Account Executive at New Home Guide," which sounds like something you do until Cat can find a spot for you.)

And Here Are the Finalists

My Ticket Confession and Your Plainsman grant Cumulus Media Inc., The Ticket 1310 AM and 96.7 FM, David Moore, and their respective successors and assigns, a perpetual, non-cancellable, worldwide, royalty-free right and license to use any of the following names for the segment nka "The Ranch Report."  Oh, all right, you can send me something from the prize closet.

I've stayed away from David Moore-based names, because I have a feeling he may be destined for bigger things that might require his premature retirement from the Report.

The Star Telegram.

My personal favorite because it combines the name of the facility with the idea of communication. This would probably require a deal with the Fort Worth Star-Telegram, but here's the thing -- you leverage that into the newspaper being a sponsor of the segment.  Big problem, though:  David Moore is affiliated with the rival Dallas Morning News, as is The Ticket itself.  Too bad.

The Range Report.

Cheap variation; leverages current name recognition.  Reflects the wider open spaces in rural Frisco, the kind of landscape where real cowboys ply their trade, and the Jones's ownership of a large percentage of of north Texas real estate.

The Post from Polaris or The Polaris Post.

The Star.  It's up north.  It's the north Star.  Polaris is the North Star.   Leverage with sponsorship by Polaris personal recreational vehicles.

The Ford Focus.

Highly descriptive and an accurate description of David's report from the Ford Center (the name of the stadium itself at The Star, which is the name of the complex).   And another leverage opportunity for Chris-Chris:  Get the DFW-area Ford dealers, or an individual dealer, to sponsor the segment.  Trademark infringement, using the name of a Ford model?  After all, it draws attention to the Ford-ness of the Ford Center, which is what Ford wants by paying to slap it's name on the thing to begin with  Get the crack Cumulus attorneys on it.  If it's too much of a legal problem, then:

The Ford Follies.

Star Tracks.

The DM Report

All right, it's a David Moore reference.  But the leverage opportunities for D&M Auto Leasing are too good to pass up.  Much like the Musers' "Tell them that D&M sent you."  Now if David's middle name is Nathan or Neal or something like that, you'd really have something.