Monday, September 5, 2016

And Here Are the Finalists


My Ticket Confession and Your Plainsman grant Cumulus Media Inc., The Ticket 1310 AM and 96.7 FM, David Moore, and their respective successors and assigns, a perpetual, non-cancellable, worldwide, royalty-free right and license to use any of the following names for the segment nka "The Ranch Report."  Oh, all right, you can send me something from the prize closet.

I've stayed away from David Moore-based names, because I have a feeling he may be destined for bigger things that might require his premature retirement from the Report.

The Star Telegram.

My personal favorite because it combines the name of the facility with the idea of communication. This would probably require a deal with the Fort Worth Star-Telegram, but here's the thing -- you leverage that into the newspaper being a sponsor of the segment.  Big problem, though:  David Moore is affiliated with the rival Dallas Morning News, as is The Ticket itself.  Too bad.

The Range Report.

Cheap variation; leverages current name recognition.  Reflects the wider open spaces in rural Frisco, the kind of landscape where real cowboys ply their trade, and the Jones's ownership of a large percentage of of north Texas real estate.

The Post from Polaris or The Polaris Post.

The Star.  It's up north.  It's the north Star.  Polaris is the North Star.   Leverage with sponsorship by Polaris personal recreational vehicles.

The Ford Focus.

Highly descriptive and an accurate description of David's report from the Ford Center (the name of the stadium itself at The Star, which is the name of the complex).   And another leverage opportunity for Chris-Chris:  Get the DFW-area Ford dealers, or an individual dealer, to sponsor the segment.  Trademark infringement, using the name of a Ford model?  After all, it draws attention to the Ford-ness of the Ford Center, which is what Ford wants by paying to slap it's name on the thing to begin with  Get the crack Cumulus attorneys on it.  If it's too much of a legal problem, then:

The Ford Follies.

Star Tracks.

The DM Report

All right, it's a David Moore reference.  But the leverage opportunities for D&M Auto Leasing are too good to pass up.  Much like the Musers' "Tell them that D&M sent you."  Now if David's middle name is Nathan or Neal or something like that, you'd really have something.




 

82 comments:

DeeZNutZ said...

The Cub Reporter Report. That's what these things come off as.

Anonymous said...

PMan - you're overlooking how Mike is going to introduce it.

Just keep calling it the Ranch Report.

blergoyen said...

And how about a few that would get automatic approval from Jones and co., like "The Net Worth Report featuring the Death Star." Or, "The Johnnie Walker Blue Swollen Liver Report." And maybe, "The I Hope You Liked Those 3 Super Bowls Very Much Report."

Anonymous said...

These are suggestions for various Jerry biographies:

HELL TOUPE

Dude, Where's my face?

Jimmy Johnson will have his revenge on Dallas

How to succeed in football without winning

Sig Pooey Cowboys!

When Jerry met Tony

Anonymous said...

At least we get to hear OU deflection and TCU life-saver Corby on Tuesday

Anonymous said...

Sorry, but I still don't get how anyone listens to David Moore and says "Yeah, that's a good radio voice."

Anonymous said...

The Ticket is chock full of bad radio voices. I didn't know that was a problem.

The Plainsman said...

1021: Much agreeance. I like D Moore on the radio set. The Ticket's range of reg'lar-guy voices is what makes it unique. It's startling to hear a professional timbre like Bob's or Danny's, or Norm's, maybe Mike's.

Anonymous said...

Does anyone think Mike Marshall is a spare? I think he has a good radio voice, and hes decently knowledgeable about #sports, but his show sucks. Him and Justin sound like a couple of high school kids trying to do a podcast. The chemistry is bad, and they try to copy everything BAD radio does - like counting the how number. LOL. Its up to 40 something.. I hope it doesn't get much higher

Boo! said...

@12:46

You obviously don't hang around here much do you?

Justin Montemayor said...

Congrats 1246, you got me offsides.

How exactly are we copying BaD Radio? Cirque and the Kickaround also count their number of shows and did it before us so to say it's just a BaD thing is downright wrong. In what other ways are we trying to copy everything they do?

Miggy from GP said...

Serious question. I listen to the Hardline daily but I don't listen to any of the other shows. Do the other shows talk about TV as much as the boys on the Hardline do? By the sound of it they go home after the show everyday and binge watch TV the rest of the night. Everyday it's a new show that you have to watch! Who has the time and why would you want to spend all your free time plopped in front of the TV? I just don't get it. Just curious to know if TV watching was a Hardline thing or a Ticket thing in general.

Anonymous said...

@Miggy from GP

It's a BaD Radio and Hardline thing. The Musers not so much. All they do is drink and watch tv. Every single one of them. Danny and Bob are the worst though.

nonononever said...

I don't see how M+M are copying BaD at all. The dynamic alone between having two guys versus basically 3 plus TC would make it undoable. M+M is great. Haven't listened in awhile since I'm usually busy outside while the weather's good. Other than the occasional shortening of words (which is no longer a millennial thing, but a 50 year old housewife thing and therefore drives me up a wall), that show is tight.

Colorado P1 said...

@3:05

"All they do is drink"?? Perhaps that's true for THL, but everybody knows that neither Bob nor Dan are big drinkers (if they ever even drink at all). Of course Dan is pretty open about the fact that he does enjoy partaking in healthier alternative forms of relaxation like the kind that are legal here in Colorado, and of course that does tend to go hand-in-hand with the watching of some quality TV. Good on them, I very much enjoy BaD's TV talk when it is a show I am also watching, as it usually is.

I think Machine is fine with Monty on the station, but I find him highly annoying on his podcast with Sirois, and it's not just the ridiculous over-cussing. The whole Snagglepuss dialect thing they lapse into every other minute is grating as hell.

The Plainsman said...

I like Monty + The Machine (Not a Podcast), try to catch it when I can. I don't hear any copying. I would like to hear less in-sniping, even if in good fun and even if the targets are in on the fun. It just doesn't sound good. Overall, though, the consensus of Confessors we hear from seems pretty positive about the show. I thought Monday's fill-in was exceptionally good.

And, as I have said on a couple of occasions, less Machine. His content can be really good, I'm OK with whatever the electronics are doing to his voice, I think the chemistry is OK, I don't mind the slacker gestalt, but let's face it -- he's got some Corby Davidson in him. Interrupting, dominating segments that are not strictly "his." (He seemed a little more natural on Monday -- show had a good sound to it.) There are times I'd like to see Justin grab back some air time.

But I've only punched out once.

Anonymous said...

The Hardline has mop-up duty - discussing topics that have been discussed to death since 5:30 am. They have to find topics that will fill segments. I'm OK with TV and movie talk (Sopranos talk and Six Feet Under talk were appointments for me). The problem, of course, is that superlative Corby treats every show he watches as the most important viewing event in the history of the medium.

Anonymous said...

Does anyone outside of Corby and Danny and 10th grade boys find the Comedy Central Roasts at all entertaining or even mildly amusing? I love how Corby and Danny act with such shock at what they hear like it is a sick burn. These roasts are a bit, and everyone is in on it, yes Danny even Ann Coulter. The shock jock bit is old hat.

slinky said...

I don't mind BaD's version of TV talk, but could never stand Corby's over the top TMZ crap. BaD was talking about the Skip & Troy thing today. Bayless will be a total failure. What made his previous show a hit was Skip's ying to Stephen A's yang. This move should cost someone their job....and not just Skips!

Anonymous said...

Sensitive, tolerant, inclusive Corby and Danny were in full flower calling Ann Coulter "clueless." Come on, boys. She knows exactly what she is doing. She's selling books. She's a provocateur. She takes a position and then unapologetically takes the heat. I don't particularly like her personality, but she's hardly clueless. Except in your world.

blergoyen said...

Yes, I did hear a lot of over-laughing when corky played the jokes about Coulter.

Speaking of TV, it sounded like Gordo really internalized the outright verbal abuse Hillary took from Matt Lauer last night. I thought I heard some sniffling in the radio background this morning. But hey, Gordo is right, those 60 minutes of torture dispel any rumors media bias those conspiracy wackos have been whining about the last few years. I hope Gordo recovers and is back tomorrow with another awesome segment of Jub's swimteam coach.

Anonymous said...

@8:07 AM
Ezzactly!

NPR Voice said...

Yeah, eh, blergoyen and Gordo: I'd look at it from another angle.....that is, maybe Lauer butted in to stop her from saying things that could be potentially harmful for her campaign; and conversely, he let The Short-Fingered Vulgarian speak his mind because it might effectively stymie his campaign once and for all.

I'd like to know if both Gordo and Joonz believe the confirmation biases and "hard-wired" presuppositions that "even smart people have" apply to themselves? I hope so. I think I might start up a Twitter account called "Gordo's Biases." If I do, would you give me a plug/link, Pman? It will be completely on the up and up. The account will be dedicated to pointing out misstatements, erroneous statements delivered as facts, overt biases, AND, I will provide a monthly histogram charting the amount of times he pokes fun of any and all real/perceived by the masses on the whole those of the Left and Right. I will also point out when Gordo makes a "truth-claim" that is accepted as a truth-claim by a consensus of experts in the field that Gordo cites.

Lucky Jim said...

As a noted liberal, it surprises me that so many of you seem to feel The Ticket has a left-leaning bias. For anybody who has listened to the station for more than a few years, Gordon, Corby, and Dan have said that they lean toward liberalism (to that end: each of them espouse campus liberalism, which is annoying to me), while George, Mike, Bob, and, before his demise, Greggo, were noted conservatives. Craig is down the middle. The rest, so far as I can tell, don't mention the matter at all. I suppose you could say that Jake and Danny tip the scales.

Really, though, it baffles me that in a state where seven out of ten people are conservative, conservatives can't stand, even for a second, to hear an opposing viewpoint. Talk to your neighbor, if it upsets you. I'm sure he / she would make for a great echo chamber.

Anonymous said...

Lucky Jim:

Actually, I have heard Corby declare that he is not political at all. That's a hypocrisy he reveals on a daily basis.

This is the guy who, despite his lame disclaimers, cheers for an OU student that hit a woman so hard she had bones broken in her face; but he took a whole segment to issue the vilest of tirades against another OU student who got drunk and said the N word repeatedly, even going so far as to state that he must have learned it from his parents. And cheered that he got thrown out of school. But a slightly different cheer. Yes, I have a BIG problem with the double standard of David Boren, but I guess as long as Corby wants to get invites to games from Switzer he needs to tow the line.

I have no problem with the lampooning of conservative values (you get used to it after awhile), but give me at least a pretense of balance. Making fun of conservatives is low-hanging fruit because, IMO, they tend to be more outspoken and less protective of their words. But liberals make mistakes and say stupid stuff every day too. But you're going to be hard pressed to hear about them in afternoon drive.

If I may be allowed to return to the discussion of Ann Coulter, who Corby and Danny declared was "clueless." Ann Coulter is famous for being abrasive, polarizing, and over the top. I'll just leave it at that.

Anonymous said...

"abrasive, polarizing, and over the top".....something Corby really isn't!

Anonymous said...

I can't explain it, but I don't hate "We Built This City" like everybody else does. It certainly doesn't fit as part of the Airplane's discography, but the band that recorded it was barely the same band that recorded "White Rabbit."

Worst song ever? "Ma Belle Amie" and "D.O.A." might have something to say about that.

Hip hop, body rockin', doing the do said...

D.O.A by Van Halen rocks balls. D.O.A the hardcore punk band is rather crappy.

We Built This City always makes me feel like I'm knee deep in the hoopla. I like yat.

Yo, Lucky Jim, neat trick that one. The old position yourself as some sort of pragmatic middle of the road guy where those with whom you disagree are portrayed as unreasonable and narrow minded freshman debate team tactic is lame-0. To the max, bud. To. The. Max. So gag me with a spoon whilst I put on my Girbaud jeans and Coca Cola brand button down.

Roger said...

It's not an opposing viewpoint that irks some, Lucky "noted liberal" Jim, but rather. when individuals, situations, etc., are erroneously depicted. I think several commenters have nicely pointed out that, while Ann Coulter might not be everyone's cup of tea, she is--as can be readily seen by her success as an author, t.v. analyst, et al--by no means clueless. The same can be said of those pointing out some of the more egregious, glaring, and oft spouted hypocritical views by some of the hosts. One commenter, NPR, claims s/he will show by means of hard data exactly how many times Gordon lampoons the right AND left.

I fail to see how this is somehow the byproduct of insulated, close-minded conservative folks. Indeed, if anything, you're comment seems to fall prey to your own criticism.

And by the by, Mike is not conservative. Never has been. He's said as much on-air. So, if we're going to finger wag at others with our so-called bona fides, let's make sure we have our story straight. As well, if Joonz is a truly down-the-middle person, he sure seems to agree with most all of Gordon's decidedly left-leaning, ahem, musings--which, frankly, doesn't bother me one bit.

Anonymous said...

DOA by Bloodrock.

Anonymous said...

Just because Mike does not vocalize agreement with his compadres on political subjects does not mean he opposes them. IMO he simply lays out, not wanting to risk offending potential clients for his band(s). He doesn't need the gig money to live on, but some of his band mates may.

Nonononever said...

So much for turning off my brain while I read MTC. I'd rather discuss T.C.'s merits than read this political musings. Not that I won't read them. It is MTC after all. Carry on.

Gopher said...

Anonymous 4:20

Worst song ever recorded was Free Form Guitar off of the Chicago Transit Authority LP. It was a sound engineer rolling on Terry Kath wanking around during a sound check. You can hear the same thing in any Guitar Center on any random Saturday morning. There was no great cosmic message or thought put into the "song."

slinky said...

My god I had forgot about Bloodrock's D.O.A!! But as a young preteen back in the day, we thought that was the coolest song ever.

The Plainsman said...

I was a big P1 of Bloodrock's "Jessica." In my home city a band called Bittersweet played it. They had a speedfinger guitarist named Larry who played a red Les Paul and they blistered the thing.

DA said...


@ColoradoP1 (now deleted post)
IIRC, the BaD Radio contract issue hit a head at the 2013 SummerBash.

However, think about what the radio industry has become since June 2013 and more importantly what the Cumulus stock has done since June 2013.

To All:
Regarding the ratings and digital/streaming measurements, some major cities still have a Nielsen issues regarding if a station is registered. D/FW only has The Ticket and WBAP as registered with streamers. Philadelphia also has the same issue with just two stations get ratings, as their version of Barry Horn describes apparently without not violating Nielsen's copyright. Stations had to pay Nielsen in April 2016 to be recognized and access Nielsen “data”.

From July: http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/real-time/Philly-radio-ratings-Missanelli-crushes-Innes-Cataldi-still-on-top.html

"As far as streaming numbers go, neither station showed up on Neilsen’s ratings, which is surprising considering how consistent The Fanatic has been drawing decent streaming numbers. According to a source, it's possible neither of the station’s digital streams had enough audience to qualify for reporting in the data.

Nielsen is working on changes to better measure the size of a station’s streaming audience. There is no word when those changes will officially take effect."

*Note- Josh Innes was fired in August for the “fake Black caller” scandal. Look it up on your own.

Colorado P1 said...

Oman, why was my post deleted? Can't figure out which MTC rule was violated.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the solid info, DA. Alway's 'preciatchya, pal.

The Plainsman said...

Colorado, that was uudoubtedly an error. A bunch of my posts got spammed by some guy hawking "relationship" services and I had to delete about 25-30 identical posts. I did so hurriedly, so undoubtedly yours got swept up in the purge. I did not intend to delete any legitimate posts.

My apologies.

Please respost if possible. Maybe I can dig your old post out of email. What was its subject matter? I see your post above re "all they do is drink."

Anonymous said...

It was a better day when regional bands could get some radio play and carve out a nice mid-tier level career. Not so much anymore. Hell, if it weren't for Live at Budokan, Cheap Trick might've been another Bloodrock. Until that record, that was what they were. Wasn't til after LaB that they took off nationally in a big way.

Your last *Note is well taken, D.A.. Makes me wonder if fake African-American voice Corby/Danny/Gordon will be more careful. . . .

Probably not; as they seem to think themselves as protected by some magical forcefield. In truth, they seem to be. For now, at least. Times, however, are rapidly changing.

Colorado P1 said...

Thanks PMan. I basically just said if anyone is interested in the details of the Bob and Dan contract negotiations from a few years ago, they should check out yesterday's 1:30 News. If I was interpreting their comments correctly, they both still seem to have some bitterness about the ultimate deal -- and also toward some of their colleagues for putting pressure on them to take it. I was wondering when their contract is up for renewal again and DA mentioned the big renewal imbroglio was about 3 years ago; I wonder if it is a 5 year deal? Anyone know the industry norm for the length of an established host's contract?

Colorado P1 said...

They said they took a pay cut in year 1 of the deal and had the potential for a pay raise in the subsequent years, but the raises are "based on hypotheticals that will never happen" I think Bob said.

Sturminator said...

To be clear, there is no bitterness or animosity to colleagues. They are why we stayed. I promise. Without them, none of this whole thing happens. I love those guys as I have said many times. :)

Anonymous said...

I had to laugh at a remark today on CdS.

"I'm pulling a Corby. Reading on the fly."

It's not just us.

Anonymous said...

If that is you, Bob, thanks for stopping by MTC and setting some of us straight. Always awesome to hear from Ticket folks, but especially the Varsity team. Nice to know that, yes, our little corner of the interwebs is indeed notices by our heroes.

Shaggy said...

So yeah, who's the one on here that likes to claim Bob and Dan did NOT take a pay cut?

The Plainsman said...

I have heard a lot of the Norm + Donnie post-game, but switched over to The Fan for a half-hour or so (pretty good, pretty fair commentary by the flagship). Did they take a call from Mike in Duncanville?

Anonymous said...

Not 100%, but during the second batch of callers, one of them sounded like MiD attempting to disguise his voice/do a bit. The caller's voice kept chaning; he sounded very very very much like MiD in cadence, in using Norm's first name, in his antagonistic styly/trying to (successfully so to a degree) draw N offsides, and throwing in Bob's Steak and Chop House a few times--like he was plugging it, a la a host would. I'm pretty certain it was MiD. The voice itself sounded like him, as well. Meaning, his disguise wasn't well executed. I invite any and all to listen to the replay of the post game show in the wee hours of the morning to confirm or deny. Perhaps one of the archive sites will have it/someone out there will post it up?

slinky said...

Guys, I'm sorry to point this out: I get the 911 tribute [and certainly respect it], and the whole first game of the season thing, but the second I saw George W flipping the coin, I told my co-workers 'You watch! I guarantee we lose this game!' Every sporting event [Rangers-Cowboys] where Bush has a televised involvement, we always lose that game. Some one brought that to my attention on one of these blogs a few years ago and it really seems to be true.

blergoyen said...

Sturminator - a little too much head-movement and deflection when you get called out on twitter, but I'm glad you stayed with the The Ticket. If corky's best friend tries to force another pay cut on BaD next time, demand a clause in your contract paying you corky's daily compensation every time he uses a racist slur or talks about coyotes jumping out of a helicopter in his backyard. You deserve it way more.

Anyone listening to the Musers this morning? I had to get on an early conference call, but considering the political events over the weekend, I suspect Gordo may have reached maximum triggering.

The Plainsman said...

A spot of context: When I was live-blogging this drama a few years ago, I heard from a well-placed Cumulus source that Bob and Dan did not take a pay cut to stay with the Ticket -- or it might simply have been that it was financially attractive for them to stay, as I sit here today I don't recall the degree of specificity. Anyway, I reported that in my usual source-oblique way.

I then heard privately from Bob that this was not the case. He was quite nice about it. Deeming him the better authority, I reported on his correction.

So as I sit here today, I assume that Bob and Dan did stay at the Ticket out of loyalty and may have sacrificed some dollars to do so. It would not surprise me if some difficult-to-achieve incentives were thrown into the deal as heart balm, and perhaps that's where some got the impression that it was a good financial deal for our lads.

In any case, hope that drama does not repeat itself or that if it does, that it ends happily for Bob's and Dan's retirement fund, and for us.

Anonymous said...

Slinky, you're off your meds again. What's this, the 3rd whacked out comment in the last month or so? You're better than this, bud.

Anonymous said...

MiD just called into NaD. Was to the point, brief, and respectful.

Anonymous said...

What I learned from the Hardline today.

NFL players enjoying freedom of expression - GOOD!
Colleyville Heritage High School students enjoying freedom of expression - BAAAAAAAAAD!

Anonymous said...

The genius of Randy Cody.

Anybody who has ever dealt with a contractor knows this guy.

840 Bit Reviewer said...

Randy Cody is a whole bunch of not funny.

The Plainsman said...

Big fan of Randy Cody. Even the name is a little piece of genius, it just captures something about guys like that.

840 Bit Reviewer said...

I have made my ruling and it's final...Randy Cody is spare.

Anonymous said...

I would love to hear Mike's reaction to the Deathstar.

If Corby would shut the F up and let him talk.

The Plainsman said...

840 @ 1201: You have fallen into error. It is a sad thing.

The Plainsman said...

551: Second.

Scott said...

Has anyone listened to the "fast talk/fine print" at the end of the richuncles.com ad? The last line says that the media outlet paid less than $2k for this single ad. That is an ad read by Rhynes. So is it less if local talent does not read the ad? And what is the revenue for a 24 hour day? I caught it the other day and it had me thinking....

Rhinosaur said...

8:08

If you cannot tell the difference between those two things, then you are lost.

Anonymous said...

Rhinosaur said all we need to know. Case closed, conversation ended. Typical.

Anonymous said...

Here is the list Gordon cited this morning.

100 skills every man should know

http://www.artofmanliness.com/2015/09/28/100-skills-every-man-should-know/

840 Bit Reviewer said...

Fake Nolan Ryan is golden, however not as funny as it once was.

Anonymous said...

With Nolan out of the local sports picture, there's just not much new material to work with.

Anonymous said...

Robert Wilonsky is greatness. So glad he has a relationship with the Ticket. He has such a great voice and is knowledgeable about so many subjects. His Christmas Eve music spectacular is one of my favorite things of the year. Really enjoy Intentional Grounding as well.

Anonymous said...

Nothing brings me joy more than when the Musers talk Rangers and knowing that little Sean Bass is chomping at the bit to chime in but he can't. I think he has been told by either the Musers themselves or management not to hijack the show when they are talking Rangers.

Shaggy said...

*champing

840 Bit Reviewer said...

Sky Mirror is so good. so. very. good.

Anonymous said...

Corby doesn't know who Mary Kay Ash was?

Anonymous said...

Either champing or chomping is correct, Shaggy.

The Plainsman said...

Shaggy, I regret to acknowledge that 1214 is correct. That wasn't formerly the case, but "chomping" has been (mis)used for so long that the descriptivists have overcome the prescriptivists on this one. It's sad; "champing" is a much superior and nuanced work to use in that context. But "chomping" is now acceptable, more's the pity.

I know I owe you a new post. Will try to get one up maybe this weekend.

Shaggy said...

So in 10 years "Your a good dude." will be correct. Great.

East Texas P1 said...

Anon 5:34 re: Mary Kay Ash

In that same conversation Corby read out J. Erik Jonsson and Mike replied "He was a mayor".

Corby "meh".

Don't guess Corby knows he was also one of the founders of Texas Instruments. (I would guess that Mike knows that.) As has been said "one quadrillion times" before: maybe a LITTLE preparation for Corby's stories.

Anonymous said...

That's disanalogous, Shaggy. Try again.

Shaggy said...

There's no way that's a word.

Anonymous said...

It is, pal. It certainly is. Courtesy of Wiktionary:

disanalogous
Contents [hide]
1 English
1.1 Etymology
1.2 Pronunciation
1.3 Adjective
English[edit]
Etymology[edit]
dis- +‎ analogous

Pronunciation[edit]
(UK) IPA(key): /dɪsəˈnæləɡəs/
Adjective[edit]
disanalogous ‎(comparative more disanalogous, superlative most disanalogous)

Of, pertaining to, or produced by disanalogy

Shaggy said...

Do you even Tee Box, bro?

Anonymous said...

Do your Longhorns?

The Plainsman said...

Yeah, 432, Shaggy was just making a little Ticket-related joke at his own expense (and, indirectly, agreeing that 1204 (who I assume is also you) had used an actual word). Let's lighten up on the erudition here -- if there's going to be any fake-scholarly presentation on this site, I'll handle it.