Saturday, October 10, 2015
SPECULATION ALERT: I Think The Cowboys Have Leaned on The Ticket in an Act of Irrational Discriminaton Against Harmless Neighborhood Rodents
Folks, for absolutely trivial guesses about things that don't matter that concern Our Ticket, you simply have no choice but to come to My Ticket Confession.
I have been nursing this speculation since sometime during training camp, but I didn't have any evidence for my thinkings -- until I heard a piece of evidence for it this past week.
I had the feeling that something had been missing from The Musers' coverage of the Cowboys this season.
Oh hell, no point in being coy about it -- I knew exactly what it was:
The Musers have stopped referring to Cole Beasley as "The Squirrel."
I remember the day that Gordon came up with the simile last season: "He's like the squirrel that the kids let into the house when they've left the door open," OWTTE. I thought at the time -- that's clever and perfect.
The Musers must have thought the same thing, because they recalled this felicitous comparison in the days that followed, and began referring to him as "The Squirrel."
In fact -- and my memory may be tricking me here -- I have a recollection that they interviewed Beasley one day and asked him if he minded the nickname, and he seemed to be OK with it.
This year, I can't recall The Musers ever referring to Beasley -- who has been prominent on the field -- as "The Squirrel."
Which set me wondering if some Cowboy functionary -- or could it have been Beasley's agent? -- made a call to the New World Catman or someone equally influential Cumulo-Ticket Overlord and respectfully requested that The Ticket bury that nickname.
I didn't think much more about it until this past week, when someone -- Craig or Gordon -- referred to Greg Hardy as "Machine-Gun Couch" (probably Gordon, who had probably forgotten Hardy's name), and George said: "I don't think that's an approved nickname for Greg Hardy."
So there's my observation, and my evidence.
I fully expect someone to comment and say, "Plainsman, you are a bad P1. I have heard Mr. Keith refer to Mr. Beasley as 'The Squirrel' several times this season."
In which case you may regard this as a burnt post.