Saturday, October 10, 2015

SPECULATION ALERT: I Think The Cowboys Have Leaned on The Ticket in an Act of Irrational Discriminaton Against Harmless Neighborhood Rodents


Folks, for absolutely trivial guesses about things that don't matter that concern Our Ticket, you simply have no choice but to come to My Ticket Confession.

I have been nursing this speculation since sometime during training camp, but I didn't have any evidence for my thinkings -- until I heard a piece of evidence for it this past week.

I had the feeling that something had been missing from The Musers' coverage of the Cowboys this season.

Oh hell, no point in being coy about it -- I knew exactly what it was:

The Musers have stopped referring to Cole Beasley as "The Squirrel."

I remember the day that Gordon came up with the simile last season:  "He's like the squirrel that the kids let into the house when they've left the door open," OWTTE.  I thought at the time -- that's clever and perfect.

The Musers must have thought the same thing, because they recalled this felicitous comparison in the days that followed, and began referring to him as "The Squirrel."

In fact -- and my memory may be tricking me here -- I have a recollection that they interviewed Beasley one day and asked him if he minded the nickname, and he seemed to be OK with it.

This year, I can't recall The Musers ever referring to Beasley -- who has been prominent on the field -- as "The Squirrel."



Which set me wondering if some Cowboy functionary -- or could it have been Beasley's agent? -- made a call to the New World Catman or someone equally influential Cumulo-Ticket Overlord and respectfully requested that The Ticket bury that nickname.

I didn't think much more about it until this past week, when someone -- Craig or Gordon -- referred to Greg Hardy as "Machine-Gun Couch" (probably Gordon, who had probably forgotten Hardy's name), and George said:  "I don't think that's an approved nickname for Greg Hardy."

Italics mine.

So there's my observation, and my evidence.

I fully expect someone to comment and say, "Plainsman, you are a bad P1.  I have heard Mr. Keith refer to Mr. Beasley as 'The Squirrel' several times this season." 

In which case you may regard this as a burnt post.

22 comments:

The Plainsman said...

I'm hopeful a Ticket man will email me with confirmation. I will also report on any credible denial.

Anonymous said...

I thought they dropped it cause he cut his hair, henceforth therefore no more tail stickin' out from under the helmet. But to date I can't recall them referring to him as the aforementioned P1-approved nickname.

The Plainsman said...

The more I think about this, the more I wonder if maybe this injunction -- if there was one -- didn't come from the Cowboys. Maybe Beasley himself started hearing it around and thought maybe it wasn't appropriate. After all, their owner and head coaches (and players) have suffered the absolutely most corrosive ridicule from Gordon without interference. That we know of.

The Plainsman said...

9:13: Hmm. I don't think the original reference had to do with his hair, but rather with his scurrying darting, nut-seeking style of play and smaller-than-surrounding-mammals stature. But since we're dealing in speculation here, I welcome yours.

deezy said...

Pman - Interesting stuff, but George has used "not an approved nickname" for years. It doesn't happen often, but it definitely started before last football season.

I believe it's most likely to rear its head during the E-brake, when someone votes for a body part or bodily function of George's; for instance, "George's (adjective here) diarrhea" probably won't elicit that response from him, but "Back Door Georgio" most likely will.

The Plainsman said...

Thanks, deezy. Well, there goes my evidence. Although . . . when I heard him say that, there was a bit of an edge to it. Will welcome any verified Squirrel sightings to knock the final pins out from under this post.

Anonymous said...

Bringing forward the conversation from the previous thread, I intentionally avoided THL show Friday because I was watching the Rangers via the miracle of the DVR and didn't want any real time updates on the game. As a general rule I enjoy hearing their take on a game while it is in progress, but Friday was a special circumstance.

Which leads to this question. IIRC, the Ticket did not do a Cowboy Radio 1310 show last year. Will there be one this year or is that something that has gone the way of the Two Minute Drill? (The Musers should have been live from Dwaine Caraway's house).

Anonymous said...

I'm sure we all caught the hour long Draft Kings informercial posing as a fantasy football show after TSJ this morning. So this is where it's going, huh? I've a feeling this is the first of many "shows" like this. And for good measure, ESPN (ran by The Ticket/Cumulus) was also airing a fantasy infomercial at the same time. Things might be about to get ugly around here.

Anonymous said...

I meant Cowboy Theater 1310.

deezy said...

Oh, look - there's Corby, sitting right behind home plate! THAT'S not going to be a distraction for me for nine innings.

Anonymous said...

"Just pick your players and pick up your cash. It's that easy."

My sports enjoyment has dropped 17% since this shit started taking over.

Anonymous said...

Let me guess. After leaving a suite at the Cowboy game Corby moved to the Ballpark and as he approached the gate he realized he had left his ticket in the limousine. So he called Uber to come pick him up and drive him to where the limousine was parked, but the battery on his phone died. Luckily he ran into Grubes who had an extra ticket to the game, although he was really looking forward to sitting with the fans out in the wedge.

Anonymous said...

There must have been an edict sent down about commenting on games in progress. I've been listening to Friday's Hardline and I believe at one point I heard Corby caution Danny about describing what was going on.

blergoyen said...

Yes Plainsman, I remember the squirrel reference. I found it very accurate and very funny. I can't imagine KTCK would bend to the demands of the Cowboys, seeing they are not Jerry's "flagship" station. Nor could I see Jub adhering to demand, given his blunt departure after so many years of service. But it wouldn't surprise me either. I am very interested to see if you get feedback, if there's anything behind the dropping of that nickname.

I am positively looking forward to corky celebrating his broader-based celebrity after sitting behind home plate the other day. We got to hear his forced, over-laughter on the Musers this morning. I wonder if he's force-scheduled himself to call in on all the prime shows today?

darkiguana said...

They have referenced that before. They have to be careful abt doing "play by play" when a live game is on.

Gopher said...

darkiguana is right. That may be why we haven't heard a Cowboy Theater 1310 in awhile.

The Plainsman said...

I now have it on very reliable authority that The Musers were not told to stop referring to Cole Beasley as "The Squirrel." So the whole column is wrong.

Maybe they should start calling him "The Bulldog."

Anonymous said...

We need more Fake Steve Busby. Top 5 8:40 character.

Arky P1 said...

Everyone that keeps saying IJB has hijacked BaD Radio, must have not listened in awhile. There has been very little Jake and TC here lately. BaD has stepped up their game IMHO.

Anonymous said...

I swear Rhyner said Charlie Strong should be on USC's short list, but he meant to say Sumlin ('cause everybody on the web is throwing out Sumlin) and dug in to avoid sounding like a moron.

Anonymous said...

@8:01 Yeah, that was pretty clearly the case. I think Corby realized this as well, which is why he did kind of brush it off without much adu. Chalk it up to a senior moment. Mike is my leader but he's only going to have more of these as time goes on. Just hope fans and critics will treat his last handful of professional broadcasting years with some understanding and respect, not needlessly harping on him flubbing unimportant details here and there. Not that you specifically were, but i mean the ticket audience in general.

Anonymous said...

I will gladly grant Mike some senior moments if that means he is actually contributing to a segment instead of just handing off to Corby.