Thursday, December 30, 2010

Urgent New Year's Eve's Eve Call to Confessors -- A Little Help Here?

Acolyte Confessor Cancer Monkey is hoping to improve his relationship with NBC5 Traffic Twist Tammy Dombeck in the New Year.  (See comments to prior post.)

He is having some trouble coming up with attractive opening lines.  Actually, he doesn't have any.

He suggested something that contained a reference to "soaking up honkers."

I replied that I thought the phrase was "SOAP up those honkers."

But you know, the acuity of my hearing has been questioned by recent commenters, so I may have this entirely wrong.

So let the call go forth -- is it "soak up those honkers" or "soap up those honkers"?

(I can't even summon up an image of what soaking up a honker would be like, other than repulsive ones.  Soaping up honkers, however, now there's something I could get up all behind that.)

Perhaps that nice young Michael Gruber could check in, or perhaps Celebrity Confessor AP.  (I hesitate to call N.Y. Michael a Confessor, as I don't want to get him in trouble with his Cumulo-Ticket overlords.  Perhaps we can refer to him as an Adjunct Confessor.)

Confessor Nation:  Let us hear from you on this critical issue.


cancer monkey said...

No, you're right, it's "soap". I don't talk too good and sometimes the words out my fingers don't match them's out my head.

Actually, the misspeak was just a ploy to make the front page. Great success.

As for soaking them up, you could use a biscuit or nice ciabatta. My personal preference is sourdough, but you can't find any respectable sourdough east of Sacramento, in my opinion.

Anonymous said...

Honkers should always be soaped. Never soaked. It's in the Constitution.

Christy said...

Sorry to be a downer to this particular post of all things...

RIP to former long time Ticket overnight board operator Joel Jenista.

Anonymous said...


I second that. If memory serves, didn't he have ALS?

P1 Steven said...

Thanks for the buzz kill Christy. I was laughing about Honkers being soaped up & then u had to tell me the bad news. You ruined my life.

The Plainsman said...

Christy, where did you hear this? I'd like to get an obit up but want to chase down some confirmation. Thanks very much for letting us know.

The Plainsman said...

May I ask posters to hold comments on Joel until I can post an obit? I Googled Joel but didn't get anything. I'll try to get by the channel to see if they say anything. Christy, again, if you could check in with your source I'd be grateful.

Thanks to Confessors for holding off.

Honker/Soaping/Tammy Dombeck comments may now resume.

Scott said...

I am all for discussing Tammy's honkers as I have often considered what soaping or soaking or any other activity with said honkers would be like.

Christy said...

My sincere apologies, his name was actually spelled Joel least according to the broadcast news story below.

I also apologize to P1 Steven. [Gordo's whisper voice] "I'm sorry."

Joel was a huge fan of the Asian Film Festival of Dallas, and their organizers have the news on their facebook statuses.

NBC DFW did a story on him last year.

It's too bad it's dry dock time (and SMU bowl game today to boot) because I haven't heard a Ticket on-air guy bring this up. I hope I'm mistaken. Anyhow, I'm sure The Musers and The Hardline will say something/do a segment about Joel when they come back.

The Plainsman said...

Thanks, Christy.

The UnTicket confirms.

Composing obit. Will be up ASAP.

Honker lovers (or soap lovers, or Tammy Dombeck fans) resume.

The Plainsman said...

My obit for Joel Ginesta is now up:

Douglas Sutherland said...

Very nice tribute to Joel, Plainsman. Now if we could get back to the playful topic at hand...
Allow me to share with you my 2 all time favorite pickup lines:
1. I'm not a storm chaser but I'll follow you in a van.
2. You must be the horizon because you're far out.
God speed, C Monk.

The Plainsman said...

Mine is (or was, until Mrs. Plainsman claimed me in a frontier lottery):

ME: Hello. I'm The Plainsman, but you can call me Plain.

HER: You got that right.

Erik said...

I believe this is a hand-crafted, premium pickup line that I thought of myself(unconfirmed, although I've never heard anybody use it before). I've never used it, but I have told my wife about it now that we're married, and she loves it. (I'm married now at 22, so maybe I got cred?)

So here's the line: Is your body from McDonalds? Cuz I'm lovin it!

if you want to start of wf with some comey, here's another hand crafted joke! If she's a girl that like enjoys clothes, skirts, shopping etc. : What did the skirt do during trial? it "pleated" guilty!

Y'know , just some thoughts.

You may just want to stick with telling her you want to soap up those honkers.