Monday, December 3, 2018

There Is Nothing Like the Ticket


Or maybe there's nobody like Gordon Keith.

Or maybe there's nobody like Jason "Killer" Kellison.

But as I was marveling this morning at yet another one of Killer's Gordon-penned oral essays, this one on Christmas, the thought that came to me was that as brilliant as Gordon can be -- is -- and as perfect a foil as Killer has sacrificed his dignity and self-esteem to become, what's unreproduceable these bits is the combination of the two of them, and Junior's appreciative laughing-but-not-overlaughing, and Jeff Catlin keeping his hand lightly enough on the tiller to allow this kind of satire on some things that some listeners unquestionably believe are beyond kidding.

Gordon couldn't perform that essay himself.  It would never work.  The words wouldn't be funny coming out of his smart mouth.  Jer -- no.  Craig, George -- no.  Fernando -- certainly not.  Killer -- he ain't dumb, but his history of eager but not-entirely-smooth forays onto the air makes him the perfect interpreter of these bits, which I almost always find hilarious.  Of course, nobody thinks Killer is dumb.  I sure don't; Ticket management certainly doesn't.  But in Killer, Gordon has found the perfect actor, and it's impossible to imagine any other program on The Ticket or the Fan or ESPN where that bit could even have been offered. 

Which is why, among many other reasons, The Ticket is essential.  It is the only home for certain kinds of programming, the for the peculiar genius that bubbles up out of the chemistry between this once-in-a-lifetime -- or maybe once-in-a-generation -- set of humans.

Ken Berry, RIP.




9 comments:

  1. I can't believe we're just 2 days away from the greatest day of the year, White Elephant Day. Any predictions?

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  2. I hope to be able to catch more than usual this year. It seems like the selection process is getting pretty good reviews around here.

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  3. I thought this morning's essay was the first unsuccessful one. Sounded forced, disingenuous. To me, Gordon has been off his game for some time now. Even Fake Jerry has become baser, shorter in duration, and less clever. Indeed, most all his bits have become as such. Perhaps he's bored, grown weary of doing the same sort of next level yet at heart rather base bits decade after decade? Don't know. Whatever the case, I find myself punching out more and more when the 840 bit comes around. That, for me, was unthinkable until of late.

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  4. It's not nearly as funny when Gordon purposefully writes jibberish to make Killer sound even dumber

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  5. I love them. One of the funniest things they do. Today's was as good as the others have been, IMHO.

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  6. What would happen if the Musers and the Hardline flipped spots? Do you think that it would reenergize them or would it be the same shows different times? They both seem so stale of late.

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  7. Yeah, I thought it was pretty good. I generally don't like it when Gordon does stuff that is so demeaning, but Killer knows what he's getting into and has bought into the bit, so I can enjoy the writing. Just as long as we don't import the stupidity of the essay and special-needs reading style into Killer's actual personae.

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  8. Jason Witten needs a new tailor and less hair.

    Did Booger seem a little less intrusive tonight?

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  9. First off this would never happen but I will humor the thought.

    The Musers are freewheeling when admitting that the 0400 alarms can wear on them. Especially during training camp when that’s closer to 0200. I do know they take advantage of it though. Craig and Gordon have discussed a number of weekend trips they take that are only feasible if you can get on the road at noon. Jub seems to only gig on the weekends which works. Make no mistake, the Musers are the

    The linch pin would be the Hardline. Morning drive just doesn’t fit into their lives outside of the station. Their time slot is likely in their contract. Mike and Danny wouldn’t be able to gig during the week. And if you think Corby doesn’t do any show prep at by 330 pm, what does that look like at 0530? I rarely have the radio on beyond WTDS but when it is, I quickly realize that everything that comes out of his mouth is a retread thought from a show earlier in the day.

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